♥ Mature Love 6 ♥

♥ Mature love knows
♥ What I have discovered
♥ I have certainly learned
♥ I know a couple

Mature love knows that even if today was a horrible day, tomorrow can be better, the bad patches are just as beneficial to the relationship as the good times, and as a matter of fact they can often be a means to growth. This has certainly been true in my life and in my relationships. Bad times always frightened me in my relationships and mostly, what ever caused them in the first place, rarely got discussed. Eventually the same issues would crop up and because we didn’t have the maturity to deal with the stuff as it cropped up, each time would cause everything to snowball into things we could no longer deal with. Today I make sure to deal with any issues that crop up as quickly as possible. Even if the issue seems trivial – if it’s worth thinking about and causes discomfort – then I bring it to the table and it is discussed. Once the issue is discussed and each person is satisfied with the outcome, we move on. The issues mostly always dissolve and rarely, if ever, crop up again.

What I have discovered is that most issues are caused by miscommunication and things get blown out of proportion. We generally learn a great deal about one another during these discussions and growth develops. We generally come out of these times feeling stronger as individuals and as a stronger couple.

I have certainly learned the lesson that a bad patch today can bring joy tomorrow. Don’t forget to use good communication skills when discussing issues. Screaming, name calling, insults, manipulation, and having an “I’m not going to listen or talk to you” attitude is not going to deal with the problem. Discuss with a mature attitude and the issue will get resolved in time.

I know a couple who have been married for 30 years or more and I have no idea how they can stay married to one another, she is especially sarcastic and down right mean. She can hold on to a grudge like nobody can, she insults him, puts him down and treats him very badly in front of other people, I cannot imagine how she must treat him when they are alone together. He, on the other hand, treats her like a queen. He takes her put downs with a grain of salt and still comes out smiling, I wonder how he really feels deep down inside. I cannot imagine being happy in this kind of relationship, but hey, to each his own. I would never recommend allowing anyone to treat someone like this, I believe this to be an abusive situation and the one being abused is enabling the other to do it.

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